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The More Things Change, the Less They Do

I am having a very time-trippy uncomfortable moment.  I just caught Interview With the Vampire on television, and since it used to be one of my favorite films but I haven’t watched it in years, I thought I’d give it a go.  And then I started remembering why I saw it 7 times in the theater (a personal record-tying share with Reality Bites).  I was in the midst of a mental collapse when Interview appeared onscreen in November 1994.  The next month I would voluntarily check myself into mental hospital, mistakenly thinking I was going to sleep for a week or so.  But in the days surrounding my hospital stay, I obsessed over this dark, Gothic film because unlike almost everything else around me, it made sense.

So you’d think twenty years down the road I’d be rather removed from the experience.  Frighteningly, I’m not.  I’m not as depressed as I was back then but I might be more mentally disturbed.  I still feel like that barely out of her teens girl embarking upon a path of rebellion.  However, whereas she felt everything, much of if painfully so, I seem to be drifting through events at a great distance, only occasionally experience a moment or two with a sting so sharp it threatens to overwhelm me.


About clocklearf

I've wanted to be a writer since the third grade.


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